wow

so its only been a long time :) Thats ok though! Good News! I started school again! YAY! I miss the social life that comes from school... school is needed to keep me busy as well... which I can't say I miss the homework, because I don't but I missed the atmosphere...nothing much else is new though... BYU FOOTBALL has begun :) the first home game is this weekend!!! I CANT WAIT!!!!

the american idol journey part one

well I have officially started the American idol journey! My mom and I drove to Grand Junction on Friday, the finished the drive to Denver Saturday... DENVER IS HUGE!!! I've been to some big cities but its seems endless! Its so weird cause you look to the east and you see flat terrains with lots of buildings... nothing else. Then you look to the west and you see crazy amounts of mountains... total opposite but incredible at the same time. So today at 4 am we woke up and went over to Invesco field at mile high and got in line to get registered. It was 4:30 am and there were at least 3000 people already there. So we got in line sat down and waited... and did some more waiting. I talked to some people, the girl behind me auditioned last year at SLC and made it to the third round of producers so it was good to hear what she had to say... to kind of understand the process a bit more. So after 4 hours of waiting we finally got registered. I got my sweet orange wristband and seat tickets and my mom got her blue wristband ( orange=contestant and blue=guest). So I don't have to go in line again till Tuesday, the actual audition day. So tomorrow we are just going to go play in Denver and sight see, shop, the usual. So this is part one of the journey. I'm so excited!!! and scared to death at the same time but it should be good... its a fun experience and I least I can go till I'm 28... but I'm hoping that I only have to do this year :) So I'll update this Tuesday or Wednesday depending on what time i get finished with the auditions. Wish me Luck!!!

probably the most random blog ever

why is this blog random? well its cause im currently sitting on top of my washer in the little closet in the hall of my apartment typing this up :) Why am i sitting on my washer in the little closet with the doors shut? cause im doing my friends laundry and she has A TON of laundry so im thinking i can squeeze in all the light colors in one load... well you see its a small washing machine so im having to sit on it to keep it from ripping out of the wall while it spins the clothes inside :) its a nice little massage thats for sure :) but yes i thought i would just share this little thought with all who care to know :)

state results

well i didnt win the overall title but i won talent... again... not that i mind its just that i would like to be known as the girl who can win more than talent lol... the last 3 years whenive competed in state pageant i have won tal ent which makes me happy but now i'd like to step it up to the next level.... anyways state was a lot of fun i did the best i could ( well that i felt i could do ) and thats what counts :) next on the to do list is american idol auditions :)

almost state!!

AHH! State is tomorrow!! well technically i dont compete till saturday but I am going to the 80's party tomorrow and the pj party and just going to watch the other girls compete! Im so excited!!!! For me its not about winning... although that is an added bonus :) Its about having fun, performing, and meeting new friends... Its not about the crown... It about feeling confident in your own skin and showing others that you can do anything you set your mind to! SO WONDERFUL!!!
So lately Ive had this obession with looking at photography... I love looking at pictures by amazing photographers.. for instance I love Zena Holloway... she does amaxing underwater shoots and its so cool!! i wish i could be this amazing photographer cause I love to take picures but im totally one of those girls who just snaps the camera whenever without trying to actually capture something... There are some girls who are my age who are wonderful photographers... Sammi Jeppson (well beardall ) is really good... not going to lie i look at her blog site all the time to see what kind of new projects she is up to.. so sammi if you are reading this i think you are incredible at what you do :)
well thats all for now!! I'll post what happens on saturday!!

Utah State Cinderella Scholarship Program :)

So my state pageant is in exactly 6 days :) Im so excited but super nervous at the same time. At least this year I have everything together early and I'm totally ready for everything. I have my formal dress (stunning ivory and silver dress ) my talent dress ( dark blue piano singer dress :) )my interview suit ( purple ) and my casual wear outfit ( grey with a blue cami and blue heels ) SO EXCITED!!! I even took it up a step this year and wrote and drew out how my hair and makeup is going to be for each event... yes I got that detailed :) All thats left is for me to get there and compete! YAY!!! Im in a different category this year.. last year i was in teen and this year Im in the woman category :) The only difference besides the way you present your self ( dress/ appearance of a woman vs teen ) is i have an on stage question... ugh. Im not sure how that all goes down but It shouldnt be to hard and Im not worried to much about it.. They'll probably ask about college, my future career or somthing along those lines. The last time I did an onstage question was in the 5th grade and it was AWFUL! I totally bombed it lol They had asked me tell us about your district science fair project.... well I stood there and rolled my eyes dreading what I knew had to be my answer.. cause the judges already knew it so there was no way that I could change it. I got very red and said my science fair project was on what causes people to throw up.... could there be any more embarassment at a pageant?? i think not... So i had to tell a quick version of how I did it and then walked off stage... needless to say I didnt get into the royalty but I won talent :) Ive never been disappointed with the fact I havent won as long as I win talent.. talent is my forte its my element... I feel so comfortable up on a stage with a spotlight on and a mic in front of me... I love the sound I love knowing that people are hearing my voice and hearing the passion in the song... Thats one thing Ive always had a nitch for... I can send a message through my singing... I dont have to have impowering words... I just have to feel it... attach it to an emotion and it all falls into place. Im so excited for my talent this year.. techinically its the same song I did last year, but this year I have an emotion to attach to it I have the look of a sad but passionate piano singer and the emotion Im putting into it is real and fresh.... Im attaching it to a kid named Drue.. who I pretty much dated for 4 years even though 3 years of that was a distance relationship.. he finally said he needed to move on at the beginning of this month and I was heartbroken... I literally felt emptiness inside and the love was stripped away without me being able to do anything about it... The song is called " someone to watch over me" its about a girl wanting to find that special someone to hold her love her and care for her... my favorite part in the song goes " although he may not be the man some girls think of as handsome to my heart he carries the key".... SO TRUE... Drue wasn't every girls cup of tea, he was about my exact heigth , and he was just your average joe to most people... but to me he is so much more.. he was incredibly compassionate and loving.. he had emotions and he wasnt afraid to show them to me.. he was by no means emotional but if something really got to him he would never hide it from me... he was talented, smart, funny, and just kinda quirky which i love. He had strong values and good morales and never let anyone sway him or his decisions... he stuck to it no matter what... he was so perfect and I had true deep feelings for him... and I still do its just hard to forget someone like that after 4 years of waiting and rocky roads... i just dont think that road is over yet... i think he just needs some space to get him all sorted out..
anyways I'll post what happens in 6 days... hopefully I'll be writing as the new Utah State Cinderella Woman :) that would be great cause I have been working my butt off for the last 5 months making sure I have everything down flawlessly.. until next time!

ALPHA PHI!!!!

So i get to go visit my alpha phi sisters on thursday and I'm so excited!!! I can't wait!! I miss them so much!!! Alpha Phi is one of the best parts of my life... seriously I'm dieing without it here in Provo!! I LOVE ALPHA PHI!!!!!!!!!

Me and Summer at Big Sis reveal

This is my family... Cassidy my twin Summer is my big and me after A- Phi elections!!

snow... lots of it

So pretty much I've been snowed in at mi casa in Lindon and not that I don't love snow or anything (cause I do) it's just I can't get to work in Salt Lake and now I'm thinking maybe I should have just stuck with a job in Orem or Provo... ya well I guess I'm just going to have to wait and see how my little car handles all this snow...As of today there is a foot and a half of snow on the ground... It snowed all yesterday, all night and pretty much all of today. So I've just been working for my best friends dad selling stuff on the internet and getting mortgage papers signed and what not... so it could be worse, I could be making zero bucks but instead I've made 300 in 2 days... which quite frankly I don't mind :)
Heather goes out of town tomorrow for three weeks so I get to "babysit" Cami... HAHAHA! She's almost 15 but I don't care she's a good kid, as long as she gets her phone to me by 10 pm I really don't mind what she does! She has tons of friends I'm sure she'll keep herself entertained.
As for me, hopefully I can start working in Salt Lake, and if not I AM SCREWED! But hey look at the brightside, theres lots of snow :)

2009!!! new year... new fun!!!

Well first off.... IM 19!!!!!!!!!!! yepee!!! I had the best birthday ever... I live at my best friends house in Lindon Utah and she is home for the break so we had a sleepover and then we woke up and her little sister made me birthday breakfast! She is quite the little chef! Home made waffles with vanilla and nutmeg! YUM!!! They were amazing! After breakfast we just kinda goofed around for awhile. Then me and Megan went out to dinner at Zupa's, which is my favorite place to eat EVER! After that.. I went out to the Xango building (my uncle is one of the night security gaurds) and my family and I got to play on the fun floor... it was huge! There were 3 big screens, wii, ddr, pool, ping pong, air hockey, it was pretty much just like a arcade all to ourselves! We had my ice cream bday cake and then I went to go on a blind date with Megan and her boyfriend Chandler and I went with Chandlers best friend Reagan. We had a blast! We went to Salt Lake and watched Bedtime Stories then we were planning on going to watch the ball drop at the Galavin Center but we kinda locked ourselves out of the car so we just celebrated in the parking lot! Which turned out to be just as much fun! So all and all my start to a new year has been great and I can't wait to see how the year turns out!!